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While
animal lovers reacted with delight last week following the filming
of a rare white stag, other stags in the area aren't too pleased.
A
spoksantler for the "normal" stag population told The
JT: "This weird stag just turned up one day and started following
the rest of us around. He's totally freaking us out."
There
has been widespread speculation among the local stag population
as to what exactly the newcomer is: "we thought at first he
might be some kind of ghost stag 'cause one day he just like vanished
into the mist. But then he reappeared, because that's all he had
done - got hidden by some mist."
It
is thought the white stag actually represents a relatively rare
form of genetic mutation, leading to the odd pigmentation - but
the information is of little comfort to the other nervous ruminants:
"Genetic mutation? That's like he's the result of some mad
experiment right? Fuck it, I'm out of here."
The
John Muir Trust has filmed the rare white stag but is keeping the
actual location secret for fear of poachers killing the rare animal.
Our
deer source remarked : "we're giving white bread a day to beat
it or I'm on the phone with the map reference."
"Look!
Will you just stop following us and fuck off!"
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