The blatant pro-bunny-hugging propaganda airs this Friday as "Clarissa and The Countryman" where the remaining, not yet clinically dead, Fat Lady teams up with farmer Johnny Scott to supposedly trumpet the values of rural life. In a series of laboured set ups the two "characters" blatantly undermine popular respect for organised mammalian slaughter by fuckin' about with sheep and cows. And making the hens nervous.

Further, in a cruel parody the co-presenters exhibit the effortless snobbery that has sane people reaching for pitchfork, blazing torch and noose.

Professor Beaker of the Department of In-Bred Studies told the JT that such obvious anti-country rhetoric threatens to inflame urban sentiment against the be-Barboured products of a dried out gene pool.

"The on-screen display of mawkish sentimentality combined with atavistic blood lust is likely to undermine perfectly reasonable attempts to 'explain' country life to urban dwellers or 'oiks' as cruelly impoverished rural landowners would have it."

A spokesman for the BBC predictably denied the JT's claims but did confirm that the Musselburgh Mountain's new show was a shoo-in for next year's comedy awards.