| If it's August it must mean exam
result fuck up time and so it proved this week when intending Scottish students learnt
that Cheltenham-centred-clearers UCAS had ballsed up Higher grade classification. "I
can honestly say" a relieved SQA spokesdiet told the JT: "that this latest snafu
is nothing to do with us. As far as I know it’s a software problem at UCAS. So,
here’s their number, call them and leave us alone."
A call to UCAS confirmed that the balls-up had indeed resulted from a software
problem. "At the last count, there are at least five clans in here playing team-based
Medal of Honour" a UCAS IT boffin told the JT: "There’s just no time to
process ‘Highers’- whatever they are."
Staff at UCAS routinely use the time-honoured trick of
quickly switching away from the online FPS |
action to a dummy Excel spreadsheet
anytime a manager takes an interest in their PCs. Back at the SQA, senior
management sources expressed some sympathy for the down-south difficulties. As long term
readers of the JT will know, the SQA’s historical problems arose from staff playing
Unreal Tournament online for hours.
The SQA spokesdiet confirmed : "After we took away the office PCs the
problem went away. Say what you like about quill-pen and parchment based office systems
but at least it gets the job done."
As it stands, many Scottish senior pupils face an agonising wait to find out if
they will be spending the next three or four years lying in bed all day, watching daytime
TV and scoring crap dope - just like every other (ahem) "student". |
