| With the world’s attention unaccountably diverted by people
getting blown to bits in the Middle East, the entertaining soap opera that is the future
of The SSP continues apace. Professor Beaker of Swivel-Eyed Trot Studies reckons that the
future’s looking grim for the long-running care in the community experiment: "A
few weeks ago, Tommy Sheridan, suitably refreshed after his big win on the libel lottery
was promising the mother of all battles to wrest control of the party away from Colin Fox.
It now appears that having assessed the balance of
forces within the party i.e. 99% against Tommy, he’s now thinking of forming a
breakaway party." |
Professor Beaker takes the view that the likely scenario follows the
classic trajectory described by mad-as-a-monkey trot cabals the world over - but with a
Scottish twist. "History shows that Trot parties
classically splinter after a big bust up - we call this the throwing toys out of the pram
stage.
In the case of The SSP this splintering process appears to
be accompanied by one of the protagonists, in this case Tommy, reckoning that he
can’t win the game and scooping up the ball and taking it home, while wearing a
petted lip like a big wean." |
Whatever the ultimate path taken, there is on the horizon the
intriguing prospect of a lot of people looking at jail-time if pending perjury allegations
are pursued. "With half the witnesses in the
recent libel case claiming that the other half are lying bastards, we could have parly
candidates writing election addresses while banged up. And not in a nice way." |
