| New US president George W. Bush is
expected to name his transition team this week, and, apart from lots of jobs for his Dad's
pals obviously, there may be a North British appointment. SkyNeil, the
shiny-pated supercomputer in charge of the Scotsman newspaper, (circulation exceeds known
world population) has announced through his lower order drones that he is awaiting the
call to act as a special advisor to the new administration.
A spokesminion told the JT: "SkyNeil long predicted that Bush would win the
election, and he is ready to advise President Bush on matters of great import."
SkyNeil revealed that he could divert some of his massive processing power to
direct the ballistic trajectories of the new Star Wars defence system, balance the Federal
budget and help George with hard to pronounciate words. |
Sources close to the curiously
coiffeured Editor of All The World were quick to assure Scotsman readers that SkyNeil
would continue writing for the august freesheet. "Rest assured, readers who look
forward to being patronised daily by a supercilious, follicly challenged medallion man
have nothing to fear…" Meanwhile, back in the US, George W.
Bush plans to develop ideas reflecting his previous "compassionate conservative"
record as Governor of Texas by organising the immediate mass execution of poor people.
We tried to contact President Bush for comment but a spokesgoodol'boy said that
George was out playing golf and wasn't expected back until April. |
