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Holiday checklist : Passport, ECG charts, suntan lotion, ten spot wrap, six cans of Super.
"Scottish heart patients have been guaranteed treatment within six months, even if that should mean going abroad for treatment. (BBC News online 11th Feb 2003)"

From: Co-ordinator, Heart Surgery Programme, Greater Glasgow Health Board.

To: Brad McGlinchey, Cranhill, Glasgow.

Dear Mr McGlinchey,

Your GP has asked me to contact you direct with regard to your request that you receive medical treatment for your heart condition abroad. I note from your GP’s letter that he can find nothing wrong with your cardiac health despite several examinations and is puzzled that the condition you describe, suggesting severe arrhythmia, or in your words, "ma ticker’s gaun like a steam hammer" does not present symptoms during examination.

I should also point out that to the best of our knowledge no hospital on the island of Ibiza offers cardiac surgery and it is unlikely that such a hospital would be built before your preferred treatment date i.e. Fair Fortnight.

As I’m sure you appreciate the overseas option exists only to relieve pressure on our domestic waiting lists and costs therefore have to be strictly controlled. Therefore, even if we could meet your request on treatment, the public purse would not be able to meet the expense of flying your three pals, Shug, Wee Tam and Bullie, to accompany you to Ibiza.

I further understand that you wish to seek a second opinion on your heart condition and have suggested consulting one "Doctor Wan Miguel" who apparently practises at the Eccies Bar in Ibiza Town. I regret to inform you that funds are also not available for this purpose. May I also take this opportunity to inform you that your GP has requested you register with another medical practice - preferably in Siberia.

Inside: After watching Scotland’s performance against the ROI on Wednesday, we need 11 heart transplants.
Febuary 2003

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