| In Glasgow this week
to officially open a new fitness centre at Glasgow Caledonian University, HRH The Princess
Royal had them rolling on the treadmills when she suggested that the Scots diet would be
better with oats. One of the assembled dignitaries told the JT: "I
was OK till she mentioned the oats and then I looked over at the VC and he was trying to
hold it in and that just set me off."
Anne, who famously cares more for horses than humans,
engendered more barely suppressed mirth when she turned the sun-like radiance of her
intellect to bear on the nature of mankind. "Humanity is fundamentally idle" she
opined, blissfully unaware of the irony implicit in a member of Die Windsorfamilie passing
comment on humanity-wide can't-be-arsedness. |
GCU porter Wullie
confessed that on being introduced to the famously torn-faced princess he enquired
"Haw, Anne, why the long face?" sparking off another round of ill-mannered
equine related giggling. Talking of royal visits, Tony Blair is due in
town this week to whip the Scottish Labour Party behind the Iraq invasion. It is thought
he’ll take time out from his duties to visit the Vic Morris shoap in Argyle Street to
offer support to departing soldiers stocking up on weapons that might actually work.
It is understood that Mr Blair will be in Washington later this month to lend
more support to the needy - this time to George Bush when the president announces his
intention to bomb the fuck out of Iraq. |
