| The editor of the Jaggy Thistle
called last night for an urgent enquiry into the reasons behind readers' inability to
point and click. He explained to himself "We get literally ones of emails every
week telling us how great the JT is and yet, our site visit figures are still, to use a
business management term, pish." Discounting theories that JT
readers are a bunch of lying bastards, the editor instead insisted that an inability to
point and click may be behind readers' reluctance to use the "Recommend It"
button.
Talking to himself he continued, "It’s a real matter of national
concern that the highly discerning readership of the JT can't perform basic functions with
a mouse."
Unless Recommend It figures improved rapidly, the
editor muttered to himself darkly that measures might have to be taken. |
"Using a little known piece of
software I could, with great reluctance, get the addresses of our readers and pay late
night visits." If threats of physical violence failed then he would
have no option but to exercise the ultimate sanction and pass on reader details to
officers of Learning Direct who would then send brochures about boring IT courses to the
unfortunates for ever and ever.
"I don't want to inflict the horrors of life long learning on my readers
but they leave me no choice. Either learn to point and click or prepare for an eternity of
vocational and personal development modules." he concluded, before falling into
silence staring dumbly at his reflection in a mirror. |
