| With the World Cup entering its
last week, long-term Bonnybridge resident Hughie McNicol still can’t get his head
round the concept of different time-zones. Hughie, 47, of 23, Desolation
Drive, has watched all the major ties in the enthralling Orient-set competition but
remains puzzled: "Aw these games kick aff at half seven in the morning - the fans
must be up at the crack o’dawn to make the kick aff, like."
Hughie’s personal care worker, Agnes, who calls in every day now that
Hughie’s Mum doesn’t keep so well, has tried explaining the idea of time
difference "I’ve tried telling him that the Japs and South Koreans are eight
hours aheid of us, but he just looks blank."
Hughie, who doesn’t get out a lot, is also puzzling over the later 12.30pm
GMT kick offs. "It gets awfy dark there gey early, is it wintertime or whit?"
Elsewhere at the World Cup, the USA went out in
controversial circumstances as Scots referee Hugh Dallas failed to award a penalty for
hand ball against the German side. At Bairds Bar in the Gallowgate, long term ‘tic
fan and serial conspiracy theorist Sean Novena provided a credible explanation :
"That bluenose bastard Dallas has never given a decision against the Huns in his
life." |
Mr Dallas, famous for his ability
to start a fight in an empty room, displayed his usual commitment to a free flowing game
with a blizzard of bookings. To top off another sterling performance he carded the entire
US population for dissent. As England crashed out to Brazil, samba
parties carried on well into the night. And apparently there were a few celebrations
outside Scotland as well.
In that self-effacing manner that has made the English media a byword for
balance and continence in football matters, commentators are now calling for a change of
rules at the Euros in 2004 - to save time, David Beckham will simply turn up to receive
the trophy on England’s behalf without having to go through the tedious ritual of
actually playing a match.
And the political fallout from the World Cup continues with Andrew Wilson MSP
faring badly in the list-selection process for next year’s Holyrood election. Andrew,
who famously called on fellow Scots to support England in the World Cup, told the JT:
"Obviously all that bollocks about national maturity doesn’t apply to my fellow
party members." |
