| National treasure and
tonic for the troops, Cathy Jamieson marked out her claim this week for the inaugural JT
Statement of the Bleedin’ Obvious Award. Justice supremo and full-time ray of
sunshine in these dark times, Cathy this week promised a raft of measures to confront what
she termed as our nation’s "uneasy relationship with alcohol."
Hitting out at the cultural attitudes that see Scotland as Acquired Addictive
Behaviours Central, the ever cheerful minister unveiled a range of new policy initiatives
to deal with our collective inability to walk in a straight line after half eight at
night.
While more cynical commentators might argue that describing our love affair with
gubbin’ drink as "uneasy" understates
the gravity of the situation somewhat, responses to the new proposals were less than
universally positive. |
Contacted for comment in
a local howf, one source told The JT: "I totally reject the insinuation that I have
an uneasy relationship with alcohol. I find that I have a very relaxed attitude to alcohol
- especially after my eighth pint of lager." Tory MSP and Hibbie, Brian Monteith
attacked the new initiative curbing access to alcohol, arguing "If we wish to change
Scotland's drinking culture then we must stop treating adults as children. Lifting the
drink ban at all seater football grounds and at Murrayfield would have been a step in the
right direction."
Indeed, as spectators at Murrayfield can attest, the sponsorship of the SRU by
"The Famous Grouse" in an adult and completely grown up way in no way seeks to
imply a positive relationship between whisky and sporting prowess. Heaven forbid. |
