| Reaction amongst the Scottish
religious right to the news that a post-shagging morning after pill would be made
available in chemist shops has been swift, with spokesmaddies promising leaflets to
schools and a new pill delaying the onset of puberty. "It's
clear" a sane and rational spokesmaddie told The JT, "That the problem lies
within the onset of puberty. If we can delay the hormonal holocaust until our children are
in, say, their thirties it gives us as parents more time to brain... er, educate them in
the true horrors of human sexuality."
Biochemist and born again Christian Professor Brainstorm told the JT :"It's
obviously preferable to bugger about with adolescent puberty than to have the little
strumpets mating like rabbits." |
In a well thought out strategy, the
religious right still oppose the delivery of sex education in schools, "Any idea that
sex can be a purely recreational activity divorced from producing little babies for our
Lord Jesus has to be stamped on." The new drug, Shaggie Ban will
relieve children of atavistic bigots of the agonies of hormonal adolescence until they're
old enough to deal with it. Probably.
Elsewhere as it was reported that pro-life activists are already issuing death
threats to hapless tablet tabulators, readings on the irony meter were reported off
the scale. |
