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Nuke Sub reactors to be stored on land: Minister asks "has anybody got any ideas?"
The MOD announced today that, in future, reactors from ageing Nuke Subs would be stored on land. Dr Lewis Mooney, the minister responsible, asked for ideas about how this somewhat delicate task might be accomplished, "because we haven't a clue."

Denying that the move to land-based storage of the reactors was cost driven, the minister insisted that safety would be the paramount issue, stressing, without any apparent irony, that the procedure would follow standards set by the civilian nuclear industry.

The former Naval dockyard at Rosyth has already been mooted as a possible dump or "secure facility "as the MOD call it.

Roy Rogers Building Services of Larkhall are keen to tender for the work of removing the sub reactors and making them safe.

"Basically, we'll just hoik them oot and plaster them over, twenty minute job, safe as hooses," Mr Rogers said yesterday.

Given that there are plans to build a Euro Ferry terminal at Rosyth, questions were put to an MOD spokesman regarding the possible impact of rotting reactors on ferry passengers' perception of the terminal.

"That's easy," the spokesman countered, "As usual, with defence matters,we'll just no tell them."…

Inside: You just couldn't make it up could you?
June 2000
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