| As the prospect of losing his
ministerial portfolio loomed ever closer this week, culture supremo Mike Watson came up
with yet another explanation for his conduct in the Glasgow hospitals stooshie. Lord
Mike, who first told his constituents they could expect his full support in their bid to
keep a local
A&E service and then voted with the Executive to close the local hospital,
explained to the JT that he suffers from a bi-polar disorder which results in what doctors
call 180 degree turns in behaviour.
Mike demonstrated the awful effects of the disorder in his living room, looking
at first quite normal, before quaffing a smoking brew and diving behind his sofa only to
re-emerge sporting full facial hair, a top hat and making growling noises. |
As Lord Watson careered around the
living room, smashing up a collection of attractive knick knacks and totalling the coffee
table, his advisor told the JT: "Behold the dire consequences when Man dares meddle
with the work of God." Lord Watson then crashed through the living
room window and made off into the night, black cloak billowing behind his terrifying form.
Lord Watson’s advisor expressed the hope that this latest explanation of
the ennobled one’s odd behaviour would draw a line under recent events and allow the
minister to continue playing a full part in both the work of the Executive and in horribly
murdering local fallen women before vanishing into the mists of Old Edinburgh Town. |
