Not at all self-promoting Tory MSP
Phil Gallie led calls this week for William Wallace to receive a royal pardon. Mr
Gallie, not previously at the forefront of being soft on offenders told the JT:
"I‘ve looked at all the important documentation and concluded that I
haven’t been in the news for at least a week so I decided to take this brave step
thus ensuring that I rack up a few column inches in an otherwise slow news week."
The call comes close to the anniversary of the Scots patriot being subjected to
King Edward’s medieval take on crime prevention, or, as he told assembled nobles at
the time: "By disembowelling Wallace my government is sending out a tough message to
neddish uppity Scots to cut that shit the fuck out. Oh, and we’ll be cutting his
Mum’s child benefit as well."
In a rare display of compassion Mr Gallie argued that after 700 years, Wallace
has probably learned his lesson and could now make a positive contribution to society,
despite the completely trivial point that the guy is, to use the technical term, broon
breid.
